Look out! Behind you! There is an “expert” looming!


You know what? I am fed up with all of the “experts” clogging up all of my favorite cable television networks. From the Food Network to Home and Garden Television, experts abound. What makes an expert, well, an expert anyway? I guess college degrees mean absolutely nothing anymore, throw them away, for an “expert” is better than you! What is the deal? Are people so self entitled now, that their career/job title is not enough? People need to add “expert” at the end of their title, in essence to say to all around them – back off! I am an expert and you are not! Obviously, it is pretty easy to figure out, that the word “expert” attached to anyone’s title is self imposed. If someone disagrees here, please tell me where I can “buy” the word expert or for that matter, “earn” the word expert? Is there a University of Expert anywhere? Nope. How about the College of Expert? Nope again. Is there anywhere on planet Earth, a college, university or any building of higher education that offers a degree in “expert”? Nope, for the third time. 

I feel this whole expert fad is very comical. Honestly, I am not kidding around here, I witnessed on the Food Network one evening, it was on the show “Unwrapped”, there he was…. are you ready? A “candy expert”. I have seen it all. What in blazes does someone need to know about candy to become an expert? I have seen and or read about the following experts, get ready for some of these experts are shocking: butter expert, tootsie roll expert, screwdriver expert, tire expert, tissue expert, weather expert (now that is a joke), comic book expert, newspaper expert and highway expert. Highway expert? Man, to think I knew it all about butter. Political experts are the funniest people alive today. Who in their right mind, would want to be called a political expert? They are out there though. Well, just to jump on the expert bandwagon, I have now declared myself, a HEAVY METAL MUSIC EXPERT. So there. From now on, when people ask me what it is that I do, I will reply, with self indulged arrogance like all the other experts I see on television, “I am a Heavy Metal expert.”

It is a social issue to say the least. As a society, people are constantly competing, on every aspect of life. Someone with a rather very high level of competition, decided to say he/she was an expert in his/her field just to “win” the game of competing in life. Guess what? I figured it out all you experts! It is just a seven letter word, yup. So, go ahead, have a blast! Anyone can be an expert! It’s fun! Yipppeeeee!  By the way….. I am also now an expert in properly flushing a toilet in a public restroom. It always appears no one else in the world knows how to do that one correctly.

One Response to “Look out! Behind you! There is an “expert” looming!”

  1. I will agree you are a Heavy Metal Expert, as am I \m/

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