Breaking News: Target Is Now Selling (Some) CD’s For Five Dollars!

Yes, you did read the headline correctly. Target is just now realizing their overpriced CD’s are obviously not selling, therefore this retail giant has decided that $5 CD’s are the road to profitable glory. Oh, Target. While your $12.99, $13.99 and $14.99 price points for new and old CD releases were not making waves with cash strapped consumers, the $5.00, $7.00, $9.00 and $10.00 prices for CD’s at Super Walmart were. So, the brainiacs at Target decided to take a look at their #1 competitor and realized, hey, we can sell $5 CD’s too! Um, wrong. I’ll tell you all why…

Super Walmart has been selling hundreds of different CD titles at $5 per for the last few years now. The selection is always rotating as each week passes by too. Selection is key here for its selection that Target is lacking with both their $5 and overpriced CD’s. As I walked the meager CD aisles of Target the other night, I stumbled upon their $5 selection of CD’s and it was NOT impressive. I chuckled. I nearly pissed my pants. Maybe there were 12 titles to choose from. That’s it. The two $5 CD’s I saw at Target worth mentioning here were:

STYX – The Grand Illusion

WHITESNAKE – 20th Century Masters 

Granted, both the Styx and Whitesnake CD’s are worthy of purchasing for $5, I bought them both for this price at Super Walmart about three years ago! Both are ultra legendary bands. Oh Target. You’re like the dude that’s late for the keg party and misses out on all the action. Plus you’re that same dude who brings the stale, warm beer to the party while wearing a Culture Club t-shirt and expects everyone to dig him. Get real. Get with the times. Get a damn decent selection of $5 CD’s for Metal sakes.

Oh, Target. You see, at least 9 out of 10 of your “projected consumers of Rock CD’s” already own these two titles! Can you spell: marketing research? Duh. Duh again. To quote an old wise man: “crap or get off the pot”. Two words for Target when it comes to selling their scant selection of $5 CD’s: copy cats. Even then, Target can’t even copy Super Walmart correctly! Target continues to sell new and old CD releases for their ridiculous high prices, thinking that a dozen or so $5 CD’s is gonna make them competitive with Super Walmart. As Steven Tyler of Aerosmith has sung: Dream On.

Take into account that Target is recently embarking on a “new look” with the intent of having a (gulp) bigger, better and bolder grocery store within their existing stores, (complete with a produce department) and the “copy cat fever” has hit the melting point! Oh, Target. Y’all have what’s called Super Walmart-itis. Here’s a couple of suggestions for the brainiacs over at Target’s marble and ivory tower:

1. Change your store name. Change it already. Change it to either: Better Late Than Never or Copy Cats.


2. Keep your annoying red Target logo, only add a picture of a donkey’s ass in the center of its bulls-eye.

Heeeee Haaaaw, Heeeee Haaaaw.


10 Responses to “Breaking News: Target Is Now Selling (Some) CD’s For Five Dollars!”

  1. LMAO, Stone. I now know that the next time I get over to the States, not to go to a Target store. No one I know would dare wear a Culture Club t-shirt to any of my parties.

    • metalodyssey Says:

      Anyone wearing a Culture Club t-shirt back in the day were the ones that actually ate “inside” McDonalds, never snuck into the movies without paying and made certain to get home by 10:00 p.m.

  2. I don’t know Target at all…and I don’t know Walmart very well either. Maybe they both opened in America after I came to Japan.

    In Japan, CDs are still pretty expensive. Sometimes I can find new copies of older releases at a discount price.

    And there are many “used CD” stores in Tokyo, too.

    But something that is popular here that I think America doesn’t have is…CD rentals. For ¥190 (the U.S. dollar is weak now…so that’s about US$2.46 at today’s exchange rate), I can rent a CD from the same store that rents DVD movies.

  3. Their over priced CD’s aren’t selling because they don’t have Metal. Too much country and Lady CaCa. I never look for music there. They suck.

    • metalodyssey Says:

      Hey… Lady GaGa told me she is pissed off you keep calling her “Lady CaCa”.

      Target has about 10,000 CD’s in stock of that opera child… AAAHHHHHH!

    • metalodyssey Says:

      Oh yes… I won’t hold back… I do agree with you 100%… they suck with the music department.

  4. I will agree there selection of metal is very lame; but I picked up Anthrax’s Worship Music for 7.99 on Tuesday!!! JUST SO YA KNOW!!!

    • metalodyssey Says:

      That’s the best price for the new Anthrax I’ve heard yet. I’m glad you nailed it for that price and finding it at Target as well is unreal. I went to my local Target on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday of this past week and it was not there.

      I wound up getting “Worship Music” at fye for under $11.00 with my membership discount of 10%. Then, I saw it at Best Buy today for $9.99. Dude, I can’t win when it comes to shopping around for price sometimes.

  5. Get your classic rock and metal from $5 bin at Walmart. Ozzy, Sabbath, metallica(when they didn’t suck), pantera, scorpions, dio, kiss, etc, etc.

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