Archive for March 26, 2009

“Stay at home dad” title has lost it’s flavor.

Posted in Metal with tags , on March 26, 2009 by Metal Odyssey

metalodyssey1I am and have grown extremely tired of the title – “stay at home dad”. What is a stay at home dad anyway? A dad who just decides to stay at home for no reason? A dad who wants to sit around all day and… stay at home? Too many times, people I meet for the first time give me a peculiar look upon knowing my “official” title. I guess the stay at home dad thing came about because, well, a guy cannot be called a housewife. There does not seem to exist, the title – house husband. Upon moving to a new state, 4 years later, the neighbors surrounding our home still look at me peculiarly, wondering what is it that I exactly do. My neighbors know I take care of the yard, heck, they see that for themselves. I am a man in action around the yard, no one who observes me doing yard work can dispute that claim. However, hordes of neighbors wonder….. what does this guy do when he is not in the yard? What about Winter months? Why is he home? What is this guy doing inside of his house? Where is he going now? What are in the bags he is carrying?

I do not suffer from any phobia, I am only responding to the dumbfounded looks of dismay and bizarre comments I consistently get from my neighbors for 4 years running. One neighbor, well, he actually accused me of actually doing nothing at all. You read that correctly, here is how this elderly genius of a man put it to me: “Awe, y-y-you, why, you have time to fix that stone wall of yours, wh-wh-why you don’t do ‘nuthin all day long.” Yup, straight to my face this was said. I even had the same elderly man say to my face last Spring: “yeah, now your outside in the yard again, you stay in the house all Winter and do ‘nuthin, now you got sumthin’ to do.”

I also have another neighbor, an elderly woman, she is a living nightmare gone amuck. She took it upon herself to tell other neighbors that I was “hitting on” another mother at the bus stop, that something was going on between me and this other mom. Apparently, this elderly lady has the evil gift of making up whatever she wants, about whoever she wants, whenever she wants. Gee, thanks a ton neighbors! Another middle aged female neighbor, why, she finds it necessary to ask me: “did you find a job yet”? This woman asks me this same question each and every time she sees me. It is compelling, yet very disturbing, that people are out there ready to spread vicious rumors about someone else they do not even know. It is equally disturbing that there are people out there that will say straight to your face, that you do absolutely nothing with your life. These are the same people who have not a clue as to what my schedule, routine and duties entail. I am not about to hand out a written report to total strangers in regards to my daily life. Truth be told, I am not angry at these neighbors, I pity them.

Well, the people who actually know me, my incredible and beautiful wife and my gorgeous children know what I do every day. These are the people that are immediately affected by my duties, these are the people that cherish and respect what a stay at home dad really does. Maybe, just to pacify the lame minded who are out there who have disdain for the stay at home dad, maybe the title of stay at home dad should be changed to “stay at home and do ‘nuthin guy.” You know what, I could care in the least. I write this to get it out in the open, that there are nosey, mean spirited people out there that should mind their own business.

Why did my guinea pig live for seven great years?

Posted in Heavy Metal, Metal with tags , on March 26, 2009 by Metal Odyssey

I had a wonderful pet guinea pig that just recently passed away. This little guinea pig was named Tigger and lived for 7 lively, great years. Recently, people that I have spoken to in regards to my guinea pig keep asking me, “Is it normal for a guinea pig to live that long”? Or, “What is the normal life expectancy of a guinea pig”? Well, without consulting a PHD in guinea pig science, I answer quite unscientifically on my very own with “The normal life expectancy of a guinea pig is 3 to 7 years.” I am now convinced that my guinea pig, Tigger, lived to the fullest on the life expectancy scale for this particular species. God bless any guinea pig that has lived longer than Tigger. Now, without further non-essential blabber, here is another very unscientific reason for why I BELIEVE my little guinea pig, Tigger, lived for 7 happy years: METAL MUSIC – and plenty of it. 

Tigger lived in a very spacious, very expansive cage, fully equipped with an oversized water bottle and plenty of guinea pig food, with alfalfa and timothy hay – 24/7. Not a bad gig for any little rodent. Tigger was situated in the area of my home which has the stereo system, therefore, Tigger was able to enjoy the Metal music each and every time I enjoyed it. Skeptics may ask, “How do you know a guinea pig actually enjoyed Metal music”? My answer is simply, (and this time it is scientific) from observation. I do not care what it is in life you observe, if you are observing something that is living, everyday, for 7 years, I would hope you could scientifically make a judgement call as to the overall behavior and changes in behavior due to it’s surroundings and external stimulus.

Each time Metal tunes were played, from my observations, Tigger would become more active than normal, he would do “mad runs” around his cage, he would skip about in a happy manner, he would even do the famous guinea pig chirping and tweeting sounds vocally. When there were no Metal tunes being played, when all was quiet in Tigger’s surroundings, well, from what I observed, Tigger would be complacent, quiet and really not too active at all. This concludes my reason for why Metal music played an enormous and important role in having Tigger live for 7 years. Skeptics abound, they may question: “Are you a trained observer”? My answer is no, I never received a college degree in observation. I never received a college degree in breathing, eating or drinking a glass of water either. To really nit pick, I never received proper training in guinea pig observation at all, nor did I ever attend a guinea pig observation seminar or listen to any guinea pig observation CD’s.

This may sound absurd to some, yet Metal music had a prolific and positive affect on my little guinea pig’s life. In scientific terminology, a positive stimulus. Am I a guinea pig scientist? No, I never studied the biology or psychology of guinea pigs. This is again, my own observation from looking at this living creature every day for 7 years, especially when Metal music was being played. It is only right for me to say I will miss you Tigger, you little Heavy Metal guinea pig.