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Heavy Metal 101: What To Buy/Not Buy A Metalhead For Christmas

Posted in bad christmas gifts, christmas, christmas gift list, christmas holiday, christmas shopping, hard rock music, heavy metal christmas gifts, heavy metal fashions, heavy metal music, lists, Metal, metal odyssey, Music, old school heavy metal, rock music, shopping for heavy metal with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 11, 2009 by Metal Odyssey

It is that time of year again for those who celebrate Christmas and/or the spirit of giving gifts to friends and family. What do you buy your favorite Metalhead in your life? Maybe you have more than one Metalhead to buy for? Consider yourself fortunate for having a Metalhead(s) in your life if you do. We Metalheads are strong in perseverance and are a loyal breed. O.k., here is a list of items, that you may consider helpful, in your quest to make the Metalhead you are buying for this holiday season… psyched.

* Gift Cards – yes, there may not be much thought process about this gift, however, it makes life easy for both the giver and receiver. Too often this great gift is overlooked, due to the simplicity of the idea. Gift cards to stores that sell CD’s, musical instruments, blue jeans and Rock t-shirts are preferred.

* i-tunes Gift Card – again, a gift card, sounds too easy doesn’t it? A truly wonderful gift for any Metalhead that wants to browse for Heavy Metal songs, online, at 3:30 in the morning.

* Blue Jeans – this is a staple piece of clothing for us, going on decades now. Please, don’t ever consider buying dress slacks for a Metalhead, thinking that they need to “dress up” once in awhile. That is pure bull crap.

* Rock T-Shirt – c’mon, these are everywhere. All you need to do is look for them! For Metal sakes, just go to a Hot Topic and you are in a Rock & Heavy Metal t-shirt paradise. For those of you unfamiliar with Hot Topic, it is a store… every reputable mall has one. Don’t be afraid to go in this store… the people working there and we fellow Metalheads are not going to hurt you.

* Beer – do I really need to explain this one? Just grab (and pay for) a case of beer and slap a bow on it. Please, do not buy just a six pack as a gift, even if it is an expensive import… that is very tacky.

* CD’s – please, please, please, do not just buy a CD for the Metalhead in your life without knowing what they actually want! Make certain the Metalhead has given you a list of choices to look for! God almighty, there are going to be Metalheads out there getting the (gasp), new Daughtry CD for Christmas if people do not heed this warning! Ouch.

* CD Carrying Case – only if it is BLACK or has the Metalhead’s favorite band logo on it.

* Concert DVD’s – any major mass retailer has ’em… just look online as well. Again, get some titles from the Metalhead as to what he/she wants. Re-read the above hint on CD’s to refresh your memory.

* Heavy Metal Autographs – you betcha, they are out there. Oh, God forbid if you have to actually take time to look for them too. Just go on the world wide web and explore… there are autographed CD’s, posters, books and expensive stuff like autographed guitars to buy too. You don’t have to spend a fortune here to make a Metalhead happy… an autographed CD of a cool Heavy Metal band, can be had for less than 20 bucks… more often than not.

* Sweater – sure, if you are gonna go this route, just keep in mind that BLACK is the color to buy. Gee whiz, it is not rocket science to remember this standard color of fashion for Metalheads. If you are going to be troublesome about this color, at least buy a dark shade of blue or brown then.

* Concert Tickets – beware… these concert tickets better be for a Heavy Metal concert or at least a Hard Rock concert of a band that the Metalhead likes. DO NOT try to be a “hero” and “just purchase on a whim” Daughtry tickets, thinking you are going to make your Metalhead jump for joy. Remember, you are buying the equivalent of The Wiggles if you were to do this.

* Shot Glasses/Beer Mugs – man, that is the gift that keeps on giving. Especially look for shot glasses and beer mugs that have the logo’s of Heavy Metal bands on them! They serve a two-fold purpose when they are adorned with a band’s logo on them… for drinking and displaying.

* ipod/stereo system/DVD player – look, just give cash if you are willing to buy a higher end gift like this. Why? You are going to buy the wrong thing anyways… giving cash in this situation makes life much easier for both parties involved. There are way too many “geek” & “low quality” products out there when it comes to this stuff… you do not want to embarrass a Metalhead and thus, yourself.

* Game System – if you are going this route, you are a very giving person and think highly of your Metalhead. Be careful, it can be tricky, you do not want to buy the wrong thing here. Don’t be bashful about getting all the facts about what this respective Metalhead already owns and/or really wants – when it comes to a game system. Plus, if you are going to be this damn nice, why not take the Metalhead with you when you purchase the game system?

DO NOT EVER EVEN CONSIDER BUYING A METALHEAD THE FOLLOWING ITEMS:

* Turtleneck Shirts – you are basically telling the Metalhead you bought this for – “I hate you”

* Dress Socks – (see turtlenecks)

* Tie – (see turtlenecks)

* Dress Shirt – (see turtlenecks)

* Dress Shoes – a very inconsiderate gift, very shameful too

* Tiger Woods Golf Tips DVD – the ultimate insult gift

* Jon & Kate Plus Eight DVD – another ultimate insult gift

* Subscription to the PMRC newsletter – you now have crossed the line with any Metalhead

* Money Belt – only if the Metalhead is over the age of 75

* Flashlight – gee, how thoughtful

* Travel First Aid Kit – (see flashlight)

* Two Pound Chocolate Santa – extremely embarrassing gift

* Bananarama Greatest Hits CD – go ahead… and see what happens

* Ceramic “Worlds Greatest Metalhead” Ornament – very wrong to even imagine about

* Dan Rather Bobble Head Doll – you are essentially being spiteful and mean by giving this as a gift

Well, that is my list of helpful hints, when shopping for the Metalhead in your life this Christmas/Holiday Season. Believe me, this list could be longer, yet an Old School Metalhead doesn’t ask for much in life… just go with your instinct and really use my advice to your full advantage. I would never steer someone in the wrong direction, especially when it comes to Heavy Metal gift shopping.

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My Heavy Metal Favorites List – Part 1

Posted in 1960's acid rock music, 1960's classic rock music, 1960's rock music, 1980's heavy metal music, 1980's metal music, bigfoot mystery, classic heavy metal, classic rock, classic rock music, everyday social experiences, favorite heavy metal topics, feel good stories, Heavy Metal, heavy metal favorites, heavy metal music, heavy metal television shows, hollywood comedians, hollywood stars, list of talking points, lists, Metal, metal odyssey, Motorhead, Music, old school heavy metal, Ozzy Osbourne, people, rock & roll, rock and roll, rock music, thrash metal bands, thrash metal music with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 19, 2009 by Metal Odyssey

MetalOdysseyI think about Heavy Metal a lot. I listen to Heavy Metal… a lot. I buy Heavy Metal Music… very often. (Alright, that is a down right lie, I buy Heavy Metal Music – constantly). When I refer to Heavy Metal, just to simplify things here, I am incorporating all the Metal Music Genres in one. Heavy Metal… all things Metal Music. As I sit around towards midnight on this, September 17th going on the 18th… many Heavy Metal thoughts have crossed my Metal mind. Heavy Metal favorites have drifted around my head this late evening, uh, early morning, some unusual ones at that… here they are, enjoy:

Favorite Heavy Metal:

Decade1980’s… however, this decade were in now hasn’t been too shabby either for Heavy Metal. 

Television ShowHeadbangers Ball… it was the best thing happening on the tube that time of night, uh, early morning. Watching it stewed or sober, it kicked butt period. 

Fashion – worn & torn blue jeans, high top sneakers (untied and dirty), sleeveless black concert shirt (faded) and no belt. Tattoos, hair style, fingerless gloves and body piercing optional. A denim/leather vest or denim/leather jacket makes for a nice touch. O.k., a belt is cool only if the buckle is bad ass. Please note: for Metal chicks, they can wear this too and add their own personal touches… just as long as they do not look like they are going to the prom, a high school reunion or job interview.

MovieEscape From New York – this film did not need Heavy Metal Music… John Carpenter’s dark mind, imagination and music score… was enough. 

Super VillainDoctor Doom, enough said.

Super HeroJudge DreddAnthrax says so and I will not argue.

Restaurant – any drive thru window open after midnight.

Beverage – this one’s easy… beer, uh, keg beer.

MessiahLemmy Kilmister of Motorhead– it used to be Ozzy Osbourne but Sharon ruined the ambiance.

Food Doritos… they were always there to save the night.

ComedianSam Kinison (RIP)… again, Anthrax liked him, even had his patented scream in their song I’m The Man.

Race – beer run.

Non Heavy Metal BandThe Doors… C’mon, were talking Jim Morrison here. The Lizard Kinghe could do anything. Cool.

Band named after a continent – uh, Europe.

Magazine from the past – RIP

High School ClassMetal Shop… for me it was, really, I made an ice pick and a screwdriver too. I still have them, technically they are now considered antiques.

StoreWasteland… the name says it all. This place, well, it had it all.

MysteryBigfoot… the dude is huge and famous, chills out in the wilderness, answers to no one and pays no taxes. Plus, as a bonus, he does not have to pay outrageous prices for milk and toilet paper.

Holiday Halloween… this is the one night of the year where you can put on a costume, act nuts, eat a ton of candy and deliberately scare people. The rest of the year, I would never even consider doing any of those things… except act nuts.

Yup, that is my list of Heavy Metal Favorites… for now. Maybe sometime down the Metal road, I will come up with a Heavy Metal Favorites List Part 2. Here’s hoping this list enlightened or frightened you, either way, thanks for reading it and visiting Metal Odyssey!

Headbangers Ball Logo - large

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